Dog Days Are Over

If my dog days were over...
I'd kiss a midget and tell him I loved him.
I'd climb the highest mountain and dance 'til my feet went numb.
I'd dress up everyday just for the hell of it.
I'd move to another state with no plans on how I'd survive.
I'd smoke my cigarettes out of a gold cigarette holder.
I'd hop on a train and make friends with the engineer.
I'd fly to Paris and sit on top of the Eiffel Tower and dream.
I'd buy a chimpanzee and call her Zoey.
I'd finally look myself in the mirror and smile...
If my dog days were over.